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3 hot dogs

The Hot Dog Dilemma

I love hot dogs. And not just the Jumbos, or concession franks. The best ones are the small grocery store ones. The elation and validation I felt when I bought my first ever New York City hot dog from a cart and saw that it was just a little wet basic weiner was incredible. It was like every boiled hot dog I ever had as a kid. That’s the proper way by the way. It’s how they’ve always been done, even before that pesky bun showed up and started this dumb argument. Boiled.

Bacon Mania

Since its invention, the club has been one of the ultimate restaurant sandwiches. If a restaurant has a sandwiches section on their menu, i’m pretty sure they’re legally obligated to have some version of a clubhouse. A restaurant’s clubhouse is a reflection of the restaurant itself and its goals and aspirations. Is it the sandwich cut in four with frilly toothpicks through white bread, with over broiled bacon and under ripe tomato with iceberg? Well, you’re either in a classic diner, or a cheap hotel restaurant. Are there seemingly way too many adjectives describing the bread and/or bacon? Is there avocado or aioli? Well then you just may be in a gastro pub there bud.

Architecture

Now, even I am conflicted about my cold sandwich construction. I prefer my mustard and mayo seperate, but I also like some butter touching the meat because I’m aperently endeavouring to be 300lbs. I also think for cold cuts, if you are using pickles you shouldn’t also use tomatoes, and vice versa, but I often do it anyway. You could take mustard out of the equation completely, but sometimes you really need it. Also, what’s the lettuce even doig? Is it just for looks? It barely adds anything but a protective barrier from mayo to meat. Theres got to be a better way!

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